I’m Now On YouTube | My First YouTube Video | HUGE Stim/Fidget/Sensory Item Haul

Fidget and Stim Toy Video Thumb

Well, I became one of those people who makes YouTube videos now I guess?

I created 2 channels, the first one being “Dopamine Darling” which I plan to be more fun, lifestyle, fashion, skincare, and haul type videos while still touching lightly on mental health, addiction, and neurodivergence. The second one is called “Dopamine Darling Talks” which currently has no videos but I plan for it to be the more “serious” channel where I share more in-depth about my life and struggles, I also plan to do readings of some of my longer posts since I know reading 5,000 words isn’t everyone’s cup of tea and I’d also like my site to be more accessible. Leave me a comment here or on my social media accounts telling me what posts you’d like readings of first! Facebook, Instagram & Twitter.

The reason I’m starting this channel is because I feel like I need to find myself again. I know that sounds hippie-dippie, but what I mean is learning to be myself and not some character that I always feel like I’m playing (or literally am playing) in my work life. I feel like through my years of working in entertainment and losing myself in addiction I lost touch with the person I really am. I love being in front of a camera, I love entertaining, and I love sharing my interests so I felt like creating a YouTube channel that is authentically me would be good for me. After the major hit to my self-confidence that I talked about in “that post my mom wishes I didn’t write” I started filming little videos here and there, I discovered I wasn’t able to step into “work mode” yet, but I was able to talk to the camera as if I were talking to a friend, I was only able to be myself. To be honest, it probably was helping me combat some of the loneliness I was (and still am) feeling, even though nobody is really there sometimes talking as if there were someone there soothes me, and it’s not crazy if you do it in front of a camera, right?

I also feel like doing this holds me to some accountability to my personal growth, I can’t do a “learning to cook healthy meals” series if I never eat, I couldn’t do a “fun tools I use to deal with [my issues]” video if I never acquire any tools, I can’t do a skincare routine video if I barely wash my face, I couldn’t do a fashion haul if I didn’t leave the house, and so on and so on… It also means people may expect something from me, like a weekly video, and that will push me to do something, anything, without the pressures of work. I am still struggling with getting caught in behavior loops and feeling frozen like I wrote about way back in January, where I was looking for accountability ideas.

I plan to release some of those videos I recorded earlier this year on this channel because some of them were just fun and I did a whole Lush unboxing series! I’m not trying to become “a YouTuber” I just hope the silly videos I make on my journey to discover and better myself entertain people and make them smile. Also for accessibility sake, I plan to have closed captions on all my videos on the Dopamine Darling channel.

Anyway, here is my first video! It’s a huge stim/fidget/sensory item unboxing and haul and what my first impressions were as an adult with an ASD, ADD, and anxiety.


Hello everyone! Today I have a HUGE haul of stim toys, fidget toys, and sensory toys and items. A lot of sensory items and stim items are made for children so what do I think of them as an adult woman with Asperger’s (aka: an ASD)? I’m mostly unboxing and giving my quick first impressions of all these items that were marketed towards me as tools for autism, ADD/ADHD, and anxiety. I did buy some sensory toys marketed towards adults, are they any better? Let’s find out!

If you want to see an update video after I’ve tried some of these items leave a comment telling me what one(s) you were most interested in.

Let’s stop Autism Awareness Month and instead have Autism ACCEPTANCE Month.

Love and take care of yourselves,

Closed Captions Available

Ps: I know I messed up the end card, I didn’t realize it could only be 20 seconds long. The subscribe and video buttons pop up at the very end. This is my first YouTube video, cut me some slack lol I also know it’s no longer April, but the content is still relevant and it’s now mental health awareness month!

Direct Link For Those Who Can’t See Embedded Content: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5if6zGHPkk

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